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  Road rage and anger management

  Filed under Jamaica, Jamaica Adventures, Jamaica Tips, Moving to Jamaica
  Oct 8

  This story is two months old now but I decided it was too funny not to post. It was a long summer. The kids and I had lunch at Jennys restaurant in Negril one afternoon. I drove down the cliffs from our home here on West End and ended up parked directly in front of the restaurant on the wrong side of the street.

  While pulling away from the restaurant I had to leave with a large truck in the road in front of me. I saw a van coming down the hill and he saw me coming out. The idiot decided he could squeeze between me and the wall and ended up bumping my front bumper. I stopped instantly and barely had even moved. I was only traveling like 3MPH at the time of the accident.

  The other driver came out with his arms swinging in the air and he was already cursing me. He walked over to my window and yelled to me that he was calling the police. I looked him in the eyes and said, “Go ahead call the cops. I have insurance”. He turned away from me and went back to his van where he reached in the window and came out with a machete. It was a nice long one and he proceeded to slap the windshield and side of my van with it. He was unaware the kids were in the van but he stuck the knife inside the rear window where the kids were and shook it around inside my van.

  I did not even think about it. I started my van and drive off. I took back streets and ended up on the road to Sav. I decided to take the kids to the grocery store and we made an afternoon trip out of town. I made it back home at around 5pm and apparently just in time to meet with the lunatic cab driver who had somehow tracked me down to my apartment. This nut met me here at my home with a metal pole he found poolside.

  This was a little too much for me and I took his road rage and added a double dose of my anger management to the situation, thats one dose per kid he endangered. I was glad to fight any ass who threatened me and my kids and then had the balls to bring it to my home. We battled in the yard for a minute or two. I took a whack with the pole over the head and shoulders that was hard enough to knock me on my knees but I was able to tackle him on the concrete and remove his weapon in the same motion. I did loose an inch of flesh on both knees as I landed on the sidewalk and he proceeded to drag me around a bit.

  This guy was nuts and the only way I could get rid of him was to hurt him which I did not want to do. I ended up holding him locked on the ground until we agreed to go our separate ways. They called the cops who I was actually glad to see until they decided to try to blame me for the whole thing. They took me down to the Negril police department and tried to say I was going to be arrested for fleeing the scene of an accident. I told them I was forced to do so by a man with a machete. It got kinda heated after I told them I had expected this to be turned against me. I explained to them that in America its always the black mans fault and in Jamaica its the white guy. I am considered a white man by most people here and the cops normally try to blame me for things.

  I told the lead cop there was no chance I would be treated fairly and he should just go ahead and do what he had too. I told him this was the second time I had been sat down in the same room with the handcuff chains hanging on the chair in front of me and for the second time I sat in the station as a victim while the criminal walked free. I asked him how a man could attack me with a knife and I should be arrested for running away.

  After quite a bit of loud talk and explanation on my part I was released with no arrest. They decided to drop everything and leave well enough alone. I think it was the blood running down my leg and all over the floor that set them straight but I’m not sure still. They may have simply been tired of my mouth as most Jamaicans will after awhile.

  Look for some pics and more as I heal my wounds with a natural antibiotic in the next blog post.

  
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  Tagged as: Jamaica, Jamaica Adventures, jamaica fights
  
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